Finals

How many of you are already studying for your finals? I have started, but am not sure exactly what to expect. I have had tests this semester, but not a FINAL? I am not a good test taker to begin with. I know the material, I can read it over and over again, but when I sit down at the desk, with my pencil in hand and the scantron, my mind just draws a blank, or at least a partial blank. I will finish the test, think okay, I did alright, and when I get the test back it will be a low C or high B. What am I doing wrong? When I do the work that goes along with the preperation, I make A's, and I understand the concept, but I dont like the tests. So my mom says that I need to read over all of the material again, make notes, ask questions, or write questions that I would ask, then find the answers. Do you think that would help? Is there help for bad test taking? I think maybe I should Google this. On the bright side, I have almost made it through my first semester of college, and I feel like I have done alright, my grades will tell. There have been struggles, and triumphs and a lot of self growth. I can do this, and maybe I will even look forward to next semester, but right now, I am just looking forward to winter break. Bring on the fire and hot chocolate, that is if I don't find that job.

getting a job

I will be turning 19 this month, and I have not had a paying job. I usually do odd jobs for my grandfathers and they pay really well, so I have extra cash for things I want. Like I have said before, I dont like to spend money, so I need very little. My parents and I guess I do to, think it is time to get a J-O-B. Guess what? They are not easy to come by, especially in a small town, and with no experience. My parents have actually been very gracious about this as they are with most things. I have been a homeschooled student and very involved in the Student Leadership in my Co-op as well as church and volunteering. Now it is time. So I am actively searching for a job. I have put in an application to my local library, that would be a good job I think, quiet, books, I like that idea, but I better not hold out for that. I do not like the idea of working at a fast food place, I dont even like to eat at fast food places, so I dont think that will be a fit for me. We only have a Kroger and a Kmart in my town, and neither of them have been hiring this whole year. Other than that, there is not a whole lot out there. I could get a job in Lexington, but with my class schedule I would be running back and forth all of the time and between the gas and the few hours places are offering, I would be going in the hole every month.
Are these just excuses? No, I dont think so, but now I am going to have to think out of the box for myself. It is time to go out into this big, cold world and go to work. Wish me luck.

Getting back in the groove

Getting back into the groove of things has been tough this week. I can't believe how fast 5 days go by. My mom says that the older we get, the faster time goes by, and I am beginning to see that. I was looking forward to the 5 days of lounging, although that did not entirely happen. I of course had things I had to do during the 5 days, but still it should have been a slower pace. On Monday morning, I did not want to get out of bed, and was sluggish through out the day, which made me think about a few things. You know how your parents always say you need to start your day out with Breakfast? The most important meal of the day. That may be true, but getting off on the right foot in the morning is one of the best ways to make a day successful. We all need to tune up our boides with a few physical and mental daily dozen reps. Get last nights bad dreams out of our heads and think about the great possiblitites of a new day and what we can accomplish. Most of us hit the snooze bar to catch 10 more minutes of sleep and then rush to get to where we are going, and get started on what we have to do this day. This starts our day out with a mental handicap. So I am going to try to wake up 10 minutes earlier every day, and read something encouraging and inspiring. I will see if this helps me to have a better attitude and ability to meet and slay the dragons that are sure to appear during the day. Obstacles are not always a bad thing, just think how dull this battle of life would be without them. Just remember to be prepared, to play the game and to accept the victory or defeat. Remember a new day is just around the clock dial.

Pushing and Shoving and Sales Oh MY - Black Friday

Who would want to go out on Black Friday??? Not me! I got talked in to going out on Black Friday - Why you ask? I have no idea. I told you before that I don't like to spend money, and there is nothing much that I need, so why would I do such a thing? My brother, that's why. My brother got this hairbrained idea that he wanted my mom to take him out early on Black Friday. We don't like to shop when it is necessary, or when we want something, why now? He thought it would be an adventure. An adventure? It was. We have a friend that is a girl, that we have been friends with since I was 4 years old, so she calls herself our sister, and she decided that she wanted to go out on this Black Friday adventure too. She is a tiny thing, not even 5 foot tall, so I thought I should go with them? Protector? Studpid? Of course we did not go to bed until late or early, depending on who you are talking to. My brother got up at 4 am ready and raring to go. So we got up and out the door, our destination? Walmart. The traffic was horrible, the parking lot was mass chaos, and we haven't even parked the car yet. Getting in the door was not so bad, but then the obstacle course started. Where did all of these people come from? Where did they get all of the money for all the stuff in their buggies? Where did the lines start and stop? Where to go first? Electronics of course, the most crowded area of the store. By this time all of the TV's were gone, the one thing my mom wanted, we should leave. No! Ashley spotted the sale movies, and the craziness swallowed her up. In a matter of minutes, she had a stack of movies. I got in line for a game I wanted, and then had to get the Best Buy ad to price shop, but I did get a good buy, now I am ready to leave. Leave? No chance, we have to get in line to pay for the movies. We stand in line for 2 hours to pay for her movies. $115.00 worth of $5.00 movies, she will have a lot of TV time in her future. She is happy she came, she got a lot of movies for not a lot of money and 3 Christmas gift bought too. Guess what happened next? We had to stand in line for another 20 minutes to get our ticket scanned and marked to get out of the store. Where to next? Best Buy! Not a whole lot there, some movies and a deal on I tune cards, although we did get a good deal on a Digital Picture Frame. By now we are starving, here we come McDonalds. After we got some food for nourishment, we head off to the mall. We about got sideswiped, had to park at the back of beyond, but we made it to Aeropostle. You would not have believed the line in there, it was as bad as Best Buy, I went off and left them to walk in the mall. I did go buy a couple of Video games and a book. We are all tired and are ready to leave, and my brother gets another brilliant idea - let's go to the movie - he will pay. This is another miracle, but he did get a movie gift card for his birthday, and he loves movies, and has not been for a few weeks, but Twilight?? I am thinking, what the heck, at least I can sit down for a couple of hours. It was a couple of hours I will never get back, but he enjoyed it. Now to eat and go home. I took my food to go, got home, ate it and decided I would lay down for a few minutes to get rid of this Black Friday headache I had gotten. I woke up at 12:30 am, just as everyone else was on their way to bed. I think next year, I will find my adventure by staying in bed.

Family Holidays

My family, like countless others are nuts. I am a quiet, laid back kind of a person but I am used to the chaos of my family. This year has been no different. We usually spend Thanksgiving with my dad's parents. They don't live far away or anything, only about 45 minutes, but my mom's mom lives in the same town as us, and we see her pretty often. We used to try to have lunch at my dad's parents and then dinner with my mom's, but we were always still full, and my mom felt so guilty about my Nana cooking that we just quit going over there, and usually got together sometime the weekend after Thanksgiving to celebrate my Papa's birthday on the 27th. This year my Papa has been in Florida and was coming home for the week of Thanksgiving, so my mom thought she would cook and have both sets of grandparents over to our house for Thanksgiving. Her parents were leaving on Friday the 27th, to go back to Florida for a cruise, and for the first time in her life, her parents were not going to be home for Christmas. So she wanted to be able to spend some time with her dad and her mom before they left. She told my dad's mom about what was going on and asked them to come over for Thanksgiving dinner at our house, but my maw-maw said NO! She said that they would just go out and eat or something, and maybe she would cook and we would come over later or over the weekend. Not very likely, my mom was ticked. She was very hurt and angry. My mom does a lot for others, and she always makes sure that my grandparents get to see us, by taking us to visit them, without my dad and other things she does. So she was very hurt. She told my Nana and Papa that she would cook for them, but my Papa said NO, we would just go out to eat at Cracker Barrell or someplace else. On Wednesday night, my dad was talking to his mother, and she told him that she had been cooking all day, and that even if we didn't get to come out there and eat with them, that he should make a trip over there to pick up the food that would be left. There are only two of them, and she had cooked for all of us, even though my mom had told her we would not be there. I thought that would be the end of it, but on Thanksgiving morning, my Maw-Maw called my mom, who did not answer, my brother, who did not answer, and my dad, who did not answer, but she left a message for him. A message of guilt, that she had cooked all of this food, and she hated to see all of it go to waste and she hoped we could come over later that day or maybe Friday. My mom was seeing red by then, but always feeling sorry for others, told my dad that he should take me and my brother out to his mom's house to eat Thanksgiving dinner with her. My dad and I did go, which I hope made my grandmother happy. My mom and brother went out to eat with our other grandparents, who would have been happy no matter what had happened that day. Everyone got fed and everyone had someone to visit with.
My mom on the other hand is still ticked, so it is anybodies guess at what will happen at Christmas.

I Phone/ My Phone

Okay on with the story of my brothers new phone. He was going to turn 16 on the 17th of Novemeber, and he wanted a phone as his gift. He waited the whole week, without much comment or complaining, but when Friday came around, as soon as my mom picked him up from school, he was ready and waiting to go to the A T & T store. We get there, get signed in, and ask for the same salesperson that my dad used the week before. We figure we had traumatized her enough that week, that even though he knew exactly what he wanted, she deserved the commission from the sale. Of course he had to look and play with several other phones, even though he knew he wanted an I Phone. My birthday is coming up at the end of December, and my mom kept asking me if I wanted a new phone too. I have an old flip phone, over 3 years old. It has none of the bells and whistles, and I rarely use the phone. Like I have said before in the blogs, I have very little to say, and even less to say on the phone. The only reason I got the phone to start with, is because everyone else in my family had cell phones, and my mom decided to get rid of our home phone. Since I was at home for most of the day by myself, doing schoolwork, and my mom never knows what will come up for her in the day, where she may have to go, who she has to pick up, etc. etc., she wanted me to have a phone to reach her, and for her to reach me. So I agreed to get the phone. I probably have used the phone a total of 30 minutes in the 3 years I have had it. The I phone looked really cool, and it has a lot of good qualities and applications, even some that will come in handy, so I told her sure go ahead and get it for me. Let me say, I hate to spend money, even other peoples money, especially if I feel like it is being wasted, and I thought this would be a big waste, the cost of the phone and the cost of the plan every month. My brother and I both got I Phones, and have been having a blast with them. He has a lot of stupid apps on his, and I am sure he thinks the same as mine. The phone has come in handy a couple of times already, we looked up directions, a phone number and I can get onto the school website to check emails and other things. I still don't talk on the phone, and I have only sent about 5 texts, but I am enjoying the phone. So maybe it wasn't a waste after all.

My brothers breakthrough.

Well, I told you the story of my dad and the trip to the A T & T store to get a new phone, what I didn't tell you was that my younger brother ( I can't say little brother, because he is a little taller than I am, and outweighs me by about 40 pounds but is 3 years younger) wanted a new phone too. My mom spent so much money on my dad's phone and all of the accessories he wanted that she told my brother he would have to wait. Usually this would have brought on a 3 hour rant, but tonight, and I still cant believe this, he just said okay. First let me tell you that I thought my Nana and Mom were going to have heart attacks, they didn't. Next I could not believe my ears and eyes. Lastly, my mom kept waiting for something to be said or done to make him blow his top, but all that was said was when can I get my new phone. She told him he would have to wait until the next Friday when she got paid. That was it. Well, not really, but all it took was for him to get a TGIF meal in him to put it to rest. Maybe their is hope for him after all, he truly is growing up and maturing. Or maybe he just has gotten really good at faking us out. We will have to wait this week and see.

Another Week

It has been another wild week at my house. When I left school on Friday the 6th, my mom said we needed to stop by her friends house. Her dad has been sick with cancer, and was not doing very well that morning, and neither was her friend. I really wanted to go back home, eat and lay down, but I knew this was important to my mom. So we went for what was suppose to be a short visit. It turned out to be an all day long event. With my mom helping her friend feed, wash up, and help this man to the bathroom. I stayed out in the car for awhile, read a magazine and even went to go get a haircut. I thought we would leave after I got my haircut, but we stayed even longer. I am a pretty easy going person, but this was not what I wanted to be doing on a Friday, and actually, I had an English paper I needed to be working on. When we finally left that night, hungry and tired, my mom was apologizing to me. I told her it was no big deal. She just kept trying to tell me that sometimes, we have to do things we don't want to do. Sometimes we need to put other peoples wants and needs ahead of ours. I thought about that, I already knew that was true. Our friend passed away on November 10, 2009, after battling cancer for a year. A year is really not a long time, and his health was pretty good until the last month, but he was in tremendous pain, and we wanted to be happy he was no longer suffering. Then came the call..... "Do you think Zac would be a pallbearer for dad?". My mom said yes, without even asking me. When she did ask me, she again apologized that she has said yes without asking, and told me I did not have to be a pallbearer if I did not want to, they would all understand. I did not really want to do this, I did not know any of the other pallbearers, as they were from his extended family. My parents talked about it being an honor to be asked, again, there are things we have to do in life that we don't want to do. So me being me, and like in my other blogs, I truly do try to do the right thing, I said if no one else is willing to do this, I will. I had to sit right in front of the casket, at the front of the funeral home, my mom right behind me. You know what I found out? It was not as bad as I thought it would be. Isn't that the way life is? If we would just go ahead and jump in and get the job done, it might just turn out, it wasn't, isn't and won't be as bad as we thought it would be. Go live your life!!!!

Decisions

Again, I have put off the "Blog". I have come to think of this as a major chore. I keep going back to the thought that my musings are not very thought provoking or interesting, but this is an assignment that is required of me. So I tried to think about what has gone on the last few weeks. Not alot in my mind, other than the English paper, math exam, and Psychology paper I had due. The Communication paper about put me over the edge though. I could not pick a topic, which is becoming a topic in itself. My mom is continually picking at me that my decision making skills have become almost non-exsistant since I started college this fall. Where did they go? This is something I am going to have to think about. But I am not going to think of it as a topic. My topic for this blog is going for more than we need. My dad, who is a workaholic, broke yet another phone. Lately it has been only the phone cases he seems to destroy, but this time it was his phone. Last year he decided he needed a Blackberry, it would help him keep his work in check. That was a laugh, and a clue that this was not going to turn out well. But he got the Blackberry and the $30 extra a month Media package. So he has been paying for this Media package that he has used twice in the year. He never did take the time to set up his email on the phone, or anything else for that matter. So when "the phone came out of its case, and flew across the floor", the pearl that manipulates the menu, broke. Actually, it shattered, and the piece of metal that held it in place was never found. So now he decided that he needed an I Phone, and not just the 3 GB I Phone, the most expensive one. That and a hands free device, and a solar speaker for the car, and a case - a shell to protect the phone and a belt holder, a car charger, and extra wall charger and last but not least an extended battery pack, because the battery does not hold its charge for long usage. I thought my mom would have a cow in the A T & T store, but she didnt, although that would have been fun to see. So it has been several days now, and finally he asked me to set up his email account. I did this in no time, but he has not even figured out how to set up his voice mail. This will be another case of having something more than you need. When will we ever learn? I dont hold out much hope for him.

Volunteer

Do you ever think about what we could do, if only we would? I do. I think of all the things I want to accomplish, and should accomplish, but don’t ever take the time or initiative to get them done. I like to volunteer. I think it is a way to help out the world, for very little expense (time or money). Recently, I volunteered 2 hours of my time, not much. I could have been writing this BLOG or studying for my PSYCH test, but I decided to go and spend some time filling boxes. When I signed up for my 2 hours, I thought, do I really have time for this, and then when I saw the pictures of all those starving kids, I thought, how can I not? There are 18,000 children, under the age of 5, dying everyday from starvation. Then I thought about how we complain when our pizza arrives 5 minutes late. Most of us have food at almost instant disposal. So today, in 2 hours, I helped a group of 300 people, fill 365 boxes with 72,840 meals inside. This will feed 216 children, 1 hot meal a day, for 1 year. Amazing Then I bought a T-shirt for $15.00, which $10.00 of that will go to feed a child. This will feed a child for 59 days. I also donated some money, as well as my time and when it was over I felt a whole like I actually did something, and was surprised at how fast the time flew by. When they announced that we only had 10 minutes left, I wondered how that could be, it seemed like we had only just gotten started. It made me think of all the opportunities that are around for volunteering, and why people don’t volunteer more. Be it Time, Transportation, Greed or Uncertainty all of which are obstacles that can all be overcome, and the feelings you get for helping out, far outweigh the little bit of effort and time we give up. So as the Holiday Season approaches, the volunteer opportunities are abundant. Take the time to do some research, and go out there and make a difference in the world.

pulling this all together

How am I going to pull all of these blogs together to write a paper? This is foremost on my mind right now. In my last blog, I told you all about how I had procrastinated on the blogs. I didn't and still don't know what to write about. I told you I don't use very many words, and I really don't try to push my views on other people. What I have to say is probably not the most interesting, or exciting, or even very informative. Basically the blogs have been about what I think is right or wrong in the world. Not that I am a negative person, I try to see the best in people and situations, but I am a realist. I come by this naturally. My objective is to view both sides of a story, process the information, and come up with what would be the most moral outcome. I lean to a more conservative outlook on life. I realize I am young, and am just starting this journey called life. I am trying to find my way, by being the very best I can be, which as you know, is no easy task. Life comes at us and we have be ready for any situation, whether we want it or not. In the end, it will all boil down to how we handled the situations and ourselves, not what was thrown at us.

I am still figuring this college thing and life thing out, and I am not ashamed to say, that right now, at this moment, I feel as though I am on thin ice. I hear the ice cracking, and I can see the freezing water below. How will I stay standing and not fall in? I am going to try to stay standing, by pushing through each day, doing what I know to be right, even if the world tells me its wrong.

Procrastinators are "Me"

I hate to say that I have dreaded this blog, since the professor first gave us the assignment. I don't do social networking. I have lots of thoughts, and sometimes I feel the need to share those thoughts, but that need is far and few between. I have to say that I have felt an overwhelming sense of "jitters" since school started. For the last 8 years, since I started homeschooling, I have pretty much "done" school when I wanted. I got up when I wanted, I started lessons when I wanted, and I did work when I wanted, as long as it was turned in by the due date. I always made the due date, so this should not be such a concept to me. In my past life though, if I dreaded an assignment, my mom, also my teacher and principle, etc, would sit me down, tell me what was needed, and be there to bounce ideas off of. Now, I am on my own. I have not used this many words in the last year, and finding topics that seem sensible, and interesting to others, has been, well, lets just say like pulling teeth. So I have become a procrastinator - something my mom has always taught and warned against. I have thrown up roadblocks, and ifs and whys and hows. I know there are no perfect times and putting off what needs to be done, only leads to anxiety, and more work in the long run. So I have put off these blogs, and I know that I just need to jump in and get them done. I can't focus on the worry that they aren't exactly right. It is wrong for us to "put off today, what can and should be done today". This is a responsibility that I have simply shrugged off of late. I know there will be consequences to that. So I am going to try a new strategy, prioritize my responsibilities, tackle the unpleasant tasks first, even if they are not what I want to do. I know this is the right thing to do. Marie T Freeman said " Never fail to do something because you don't feel like it. Sometimes you just have to do it now, and you'll feel like it later." Martin Luther said, "Not now becomes never."

As we spend time thinking and planning for our future, we need to remember, that every minute that passes, a little bit of that future is slipping quietly away. So I need to use my time wisely. I am going to start today, while I still have some left.

Text Twist

I have noticed on my way back and forth from campus a large number of people texting while they are driving. This has always seemed like a bad idea to me, and mostly you see young girls texting, while talking to friends and driving, but you also see guys. They are even texting while walking across campus and crossing the streets. I always wonder, do they think this is safe, have they not seen the news about people dying in car crashes, due to texting. I know that we all take our eyes off the road, take our hands off the wheel, reach down to grab our pop, or change the radio, and that is bad enough, because you never know what the person in the other lane is going to do. But to text? That actually takes some thought, and longer than a short glance away from the lane. I know that people get really comfortable with their phones, where the keys are, what buttons to push, and so on and so forth. This seems just a little extreme to me. What could be so important that it cant wait until you get to where you are going? Are our lives so busy, and so full, and are we really so sure, that what we have to say is that important to the person we are texting, that it is worth putting ourselves and others on the road with us in danger. I don't think so, and neither do a lot of other people.

I was just thinking about what I was going to blog this week, as this is not an easy thing for me to do. I had just decided after driving to school on Tuesday, and passing 6 cars from Broadway to Campus, that had people texting, that this is what I was going to blog on. I kept thinking, why don't they do something about this problem? Then when I was watching the news, their was a story about Morehead University and the fender bender problem they have around their campus, due to texting while driving. They felt a need to be able to stop this, or at least hinder it a bit, but the law was not on their side. Can you believe that in Kentucky, it is not illegal to text while you are driving? They are trying to get these laws changed, but it is a slow and long process. In the meantime, the campus and city officers have found a way to ticket drivers that are caught texting, or cause an accident because of texting. They are going to be able to ticket drivers under a law that is for operating a vehicle in a reckless manner. Good for them, I hope UK campus is next. Until then ," BE SAFE, Don't Text and Drive." LOL.

Just wrong no matter what

Now lets talk about wrong. I personally believe this situation was totally inappropriate.
We went to a birthday party at my mom's friends house, for her daughter, who was just turning 15 years old. Mostly it was adults, and a few of this girls friends and her boyfriend. We were grilling hot dogs, riding the four wheeler, and just hanging out, when someone asked where the birthday girl was. Her mom said she didn't know, but would someone go downstairs and see if she was in her room. Well my mom and brother went down stairs, and she and her friends were in her bedroom watching TV. At this point, they were sitting on the bed watching TV, so my mom told Leeann where they were, and she seemed to have no problem with it. Then when my mom got through grilling the hot dogs, and most everyone had gone out on the deck to eat, Leeann asked if the birthday girl was going to eat, and asked my mom to go down and get them. Boy was that the wrong thing to do. When my mom went downstairs this time, birthday girl and her boyfriend were in the bed, under the covers, and the other 2 kids that had been in the room with them, were out in the den area. My mom came back upstairs and when her friend asked where the kids were, my mom told her. She asked my mom to go down and get them, and my mom said "NO, you should go down and send the other kids home, and make her come upstairs." So she yelled down at her for them to come up, when they did, the birthday girl, went over to her mom, and whispered in her ear that Aunt Donna (that is what they call my mom), had come downstairs and given her a really mean look. In all fairness, this is probably true, my mom most likely gave her that disapproving look all mothers seem to be able to give, to get their points across. This may seem really old fashioned, but I don't think she was showing respect for herself, her mother or the guests. If it had been me, making a decsion about what needed to be done, I would have sent everyone home, ending the birthday party. I would have made her return the gifts, and then I would have to decide what would be a just punishment. I would like to see everyone in the world have more respect for themselves and others.

Instant Gratification

We live in a society of I have to have it now, I want it now, I am going to get it now. Right now!
We drive through McDonald's, and we have our food in around 2 and a half minutes. We have have 100 plus channels on our TVs, so entertainment is literally right at our fingertips. If we get bored with that, there is always PlayStation's, X-Box's or Wii's. The possibilities with these systems are almost endless. You can be a football player, an alien, play golf, tennis, bowl and get a perfect 300, or be a futuristic soldier that saves or conquers the world. If, or should I say when we get tired of that, there is always the computer, which has endless possibilities. On the computer you can read a book, learn to cook, or play a game of rook. What more could we ask for? Just more and more stuff. Purchasing something to make us feel good, look good or entertain us, has simply become second nature.

Consusmerism

Consumerism is taking over the world. I see it in my own house, my little brother wants anything and everything under the sun, and even when he gets it, he still wants more. Consumerism can mean different things. Websters Dictionary defines it as "fighting for the rights of the consumer". One definition from Wikipedia defines consumerism "as the equation of personal happiness with consumption and the purchase of material possessions."

We all want more and more, often living far beyond our means. Many college students state that the reason for going to college is not necessarily to become a Doctor, Lawyer, or Pharmacist, but to get an education, to make more money, to buy more things. They have been told that they have to go to school, because they can't get a job and earn enough money to live the life that they want to otherwise.

Madeline Levine, a prominent Psychologist and Author, criticized that she saw a large change in American Culture - " a shift away from values of community, spirituality and integrity towards competition, materialism and disconnection. "

Is this really where we want to be as a Society? It use to be that people helped take care of each other, where has that gone?